Sunday, June 20, 2010

Newt Gingrich

Newt Gingrich graduated from Baker High School in Columbus, Georgia in 1961 and earned his undergraduate degree from Emory University in Atlanta in 1965. Presumably to continue receiving student deferments (the hawkish conservative Republican did not serve in Vietnam), Gingrich continued his higher education with M.A. and PhD degrees in history from Tulane University which he received in 1968 and 1971, respectively. The woman who helped finance Gingrich's advanced studies was none other than his high school geometry teacher, Jackie Battley, whom he had started sleeping with at age 19. In 1981, after supporting him and bearing him two children, Gingrich's wife/math teacher got abruptly traded in for a newer model (the second Mrs. Gingrich, Marianne Ginther with whom the ever classy Newt had been carrying on an affair before the separation). To add insult to injury, Gingrich browbeat his wife about the terms of their divorce while she was still in the hospital recovering from uterine cancer. According to a article, "Newt's Glass House," the congressman refused to pay alimony or child support and his hometown Baptist church had to take up a collection to help the family he walked out on.

Before leaving the House over ethics violations in early 1999, Gingrich led the charge for Bill Clinton's sex scandal-related impeachment. He did this even though he was having an affair at the time - a fact that he revealed in 2007 when he was considering a presidential run. On Mothers Day, 2000 the retired Speaker called his second wife and asked for a divorce. Soon after he married the third and current Mrs. Gingrich, Callista Bisek, the young congressional aide he had been cavorting with during the Clinton investigation.

The insufferable former congressman now spends his time writing awful books, attacking President Barack Obama and being worshiped by Sean Hannity - who still calls him "Mr. Speaker."


  1. His second wife had uterine cancer....hmmm. She probably developed the cancer from the hpv he gave her from sleeping around.

  2. He's always given me the creeps, and now I know why.

  3. Robert, it was his first wife who was recovering from cancer treatment when he showed up in her hospital room to discuss the terms of divorce that he wanted. He dropped the second wife when she was diagnosed with multiple sclerosis and he was busy having an affair with wife number three. He has explained that he did all this from an excess of patriotism.